General | Lighthearted Fun | Xanga

Changes and Themes

What is a pulse? acording to my site (or as my little 4 year old calls it: zanga zite.) I have no pulse. As I sit here typing, I can distinctly feel my internal pump doing its thing. I think I would know immediately if it wasn’t. But really, what is the big deal with changing things up on xanga? didn’t everything work just great the way it was? Now, when I try to sneak online and check out all the other sites out there, I have a strong sense of peer pressure to change the “theme” on my site so that I do not appear to be stuck in the dark ages. But here I am learning about remixing themes and backgrounds and something called a module. Don’t get me wrong, I’m all for new technology and such, but I am just not much of a designer. Take for example clothes if you will, before I was married, a pair of jeans and any old shirt worked just fine for all but 3 occasions: Church, weddings, and funerals. (anybody could tell you that these three events call for some special attention to one’s attire. Just jeans and a t-shirt wont cut it, you should also wear shoes and socks.) But since I am married things have changed: 1. one must be sure that the clothes that one is about to put on will not clash with, or distract from, any or all of the clothes that your wife may or may not be wearing. (note: no one, not even the wife knows for sure, what she will be wearing until she is walking out the door to leave) 2. The said clothes should have been washed in the past 14 days and by washed I’m talking about being washed by a professional using a washing machine. (contrary to what some of you bachelors might think, getting caught in a heavy rain storm does not constitute clean clothes.) 3. all clothes should be ironed and wrinkle free. (unless it is one of those new sissy shirts that comes from the factory, pre-wrinkled for effect. I’m told that this is a good kind of wrinkle.) 4. never wear white tennis shoes with cuffed dress pants. (the only correct way to wear tennis shoes with slacks is if they are knee length (the pants, not the shoes) and you are simultaneously wearing black knee high socks and you are over the age of 78 and you live in Florida.) If you would interview these men wondering around, looking like a sideshow for the local circus, you would find that they are simply reverting back to their old manner of dressing and have no evil intent whatsoever. What can we learn from all of this? Simply this: you can try to change a man (or any person for that matter) but when left alone long enough they will blissfully go right back to doing things exactly the way they have always wanted to, not caring at all what those around them may think.

Similar Posts


  1. I was a bit disconcerted too when I discovered I had “no pulse”. “Why am I always the last to be told”. A very enlightening article!

  2. you kill me! 😉 You know one is extremely homesick when said person goes so far as to admit missing a brother in  law as decidedly weird as you!!!! but honestly, I do miss you! and you got me to laugh. I hope that doesnt mean that I am as warped as you are!

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *