Toenails

So, we’ve had a lot of rain lately.  What can you do to occupy yourself while watching the little one while her mother is out with friends?  Well you could update your xanga site. If you have one that is. Or you could see how big a pile of toenail clippings you can acquire with nothing more than a dust pan and a good sharp kitchen scissors.  (don’t get all freaked out and yell about how gross that is.  I did clean it very thoroughly before using it.  After all, you don’t want any food particles stuck under your toenails.)  This of course caused me to consider that age-old yet unanswered question: what purpose do toenails serve anyway?


          Are they strictly there to look good?  If you have seen my toenails than you would probably (between gags) vote “no” to that one.  Are they simply a little “hard hat” for your piggies?  Since I have on occasion smashed my toes repeatedly with heavy objects I can attest to the fact that if they are there for protection, mine were caught napping on the job.  Are they there for traction while mountain climbing?  Well I don’t have any experience climbing mountains since the closest thing we have to a mountain in northern IN would be considered in other parts of the country to be a “slight rise”.  I can tell you however that if I would go mountain climbing (under gunpoint) I would not go barefooted.  Mountains are one of the major habitats of poisonous snakes.  I guess this is not one of the main functions of toenails either. 


          At any rate they do furnish me with a little bit of entertainment on a rainy evening when I am watching the little one while my wife is out with friends. 


          By the way in case you were wondering I have collected quite the display of clippings.  I like to keep them in a Tupperware container up here in the cabinet with all the pasta…now that’s interesting, my collection has been replaced with a container filled with macaroni.  Oh well I guess I will have to start over.  Yikes, here comes my wife, I had better get that scissors back into the drawer before she catches me using it. 

Until next time…keep it real. (I don’t know what that really means but it sounds kinda hip)

16 thoughts on “Toenails

  1. AAHHH wait did you clean the scissors very thoroughly after using them? And have you noticed any added crunch in your macaroni lately?

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  2. Hey if it’s OK with you then I’ll use some of your xanga postings for The Composition.  and I guess everything is going well with it at Main Street because I heard they were out, so I’ll bring some Tuesday Morning.  Funny story.
    Oh and I like your new HIP mood.

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  3. wow what can i say?….. it really truly frightens me to think of you raising a child…… poor poor hailey…… so what was she doing while you were writing this? cleaning out the fridge? eating macoroni?

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  4. Yo, Dawg!  You REALLY need to get a roaster as soon as possible!  That or rally a search team and hunt for the lost city of Atlanta…

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  5. Charbucks indeed. Well, let me inform you that although I would delight in a stop at Main Street Coffe House, I really am rather enjoying what they have to offer out here. Thanks for your sympathies though. 🙂

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  6. Wow!! Sound like someone dosn’t have enough to do!! Lol Hey whats goin on?! I finally got around to commenting on your site!! anyway i need to go! peace

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  7. Hey Marcus, you really need to update! I enjoyed your last post immensely. I read it to mom, and today she said. have you been on Marcus’ site lately? (She liked it that much) So come on! Even if its just to entertain us. lol. Have a good one. Eden

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